News Headlines
General Election FAIL
Britain has failed in an attempt to co-ordinate its arse and elbow.
In last night's election, those opposed to war voted for it, those wanting change voted for the status quo and a man who has made tax breaks for millionaires a priority has won the most votes. Go figure.
The Taxman is currently in a paralysed state of fear, rage, anger and patriotic shame.
Check back here later to find out if we can continue living on this island of prejudiced, ignorant fuckwits, or whether we'll be relocating to Greece.
In the meantime, emergency shelters have been set up in Brighton, the one part of the country that has escaped the nonsensical idiot virus sweeping the rest of the country.
Our advice is to head there and hope that everyone else gets sucked into a moronic black hole.
